Archive for July, 2007

My first job!

Things seem to be working out. I got a job! my first one! Its not exactly what¬†I wanted but I think I will enjoy it for now.. ūüôā
I’m just grateful to God that he is taking care of things now.
Its a family disease. We love to worry.. My mom,Dad,Justin and me.. all of us love worrying.. Its like a hobby. lol..
It takes a lot of effort for me to stop thinking and worrying about something. My usual remedy is to sleep. I just block it from my mind but the problem then is that I end up dreaming about the situation and usually wake really upset.

Going to God with my problems takes effort. Its not that I dont trust him.. I do. But somewhere down the line I seem to have got the notion that I have to do something about the problem and if I cant deal with it then the least I could do is worry. ūüėõ

My first day at work was ok.. Im hoping for a lot of changes and God willing I’ll get them.

There’s actually a lot more happening but Im too tired to write about it at present..
Maybe later.

I’m actually going to earning money… for meeeeeeee!!!




Im so confused! I dont know what i’m supposed to be doing..
Everything seems so messed up.

Work. Dont work. Pay. No Pay. Study.
Where? What? When? How?
*bangs head on table*

I know all this is happening for me to grow up and stop being so dependent on other people and get out and live life on my own.
But that doesnt help much. I still feel lost. In a big big world. That seems like it wants to eat me up.

When did life get so complicated?

Why didnt anyone tell me?

 Actually, Why didnt I listen?

Note to self- not everyone is nice. The world is not waiting to help you.Infact, they’re looking to see when you’ll fall. The only person on your side is God.
And thats more than enough.

You have to see this!

Hozefa sent me this. and I have been laughing ever since. The guy is so funny and he doesnt even realise it!

His name is Kashif Memon and the show is America’s got talent. Watch how he dances to the Hrithik’s famous dance number ‘ek pal ka jeena’. The song was sung by Lucky Ali for hrithik’s debut film- Kaho na pyaar hai.

*sigh* ok ok.. I admit. I was a¬†major Hrithik fan ūüėÄ .. not anymore though. Thank God!

Check out the video here.

*still laughing*

I’m sure Sheila’s gonna call me and say that she has a crush on Kashif! ahhahahahhahahhaahahhhhahahhaahhaha

Just Another Rant

Even though no one asked I think it is time for a new post. I have to kep this blog updated for me.. and Sheila! ūüėõ

So Sheila, the great friend that she is, bought me Scarlett as a going away gift!!!! I dont know whether its coz’ she’s going away or I’m going away.. But thankyou thankyou so¬†much!! You’re my favorite friend. ūüėÄ

I met Hozefa this sunday and we had a good time together. Met him¬†after 4 years.. thats a long time. Im happy to say that he hasnt changed. Maybe a little bit here and there.. but He’s still hozefa. Quiet. Dependable. Solid as a rock. ūüôā And a pretty good writer! I felt really bad that I couldnt stay longer than an hour.. *I had to meet Shannon, Diana and Chris) and I felt worse when Shannon was late by almost half an hour! But we’ll meet soon hozi.. I promise!

Sunday was otherwise a pretty bad day.. or atleast it started off really bad. Mom and I got into a huge fight before we left for church. She kept saying that I didnt have time for her and I spent too much time with my friends.. and she used examples that were over four years old!! Four years! There’s a huge difference between 16 yr old me and 20 year old me! Anyway, I was too mad to even go for the service.. I went on my own. Walked around looking upset. Maju actually had to tell me to smile while I was singing. And then she gave me a hug and that made me feel a little better. ūüôā
Mom managed to get the car scratched before making it to church.. and obviously that was my fault even though I was nowhere close to the car.. Moms! I do not understand them. But we sorted out our problems. Shirley had a pretty long talk with me on working out my problems with mom. Things are much better now.

I helped her out with work at home. Today, I spent the entire day with her… shopping for food and other stuff. For those of you who stay in Andheri you have to check out ‘Le Marche’ at Oshiwara. Its a pretty awesome mall with loads of stuff.. at good prices. I saw¬†cute t-shirts and kurtis but Mom thinks I have too many clothes.. *rolls eyes*
And the kitchen section with all the pots and pans and cups and saucers and plates… pretty darn Good! lol.. Im spending too much time with Mom maybe.. lol

Ooh,¬†I have a secret!!!!! I just heard something that has got me super excited! and I feel priveleged that I’m one of the few who know! HA! Im not going to mention names.. locations.. nothing….Im going to pray along with a friend. and then!¬†*wheeeee*¬†
I’ll be yelling ‘i told you so’ all over the place!¬†

Dad’s coming tomorrow. I am so so glad. I really miss having him around. And this time I didnt ask him to get me anything. No chocolate. No icecream *still laughing about that*
i just want him home.. him and all his crazy¬†rules..¬†“asking” me to¬†make him tea all day..i want¬†it all.. I’ve missed it for so¬†long.

Thats all for now.

p.s- Title courtesy Justin.


New post

*Only coz’ Sheila asked so sweetly.*

I was offline for the past few days.. all thanks to my dear brother.. He reformatted the comp or something like that. Yes yes I know.. I should be grateful to him for all the help..
*rolls eyes* How can you be grateful to someone who is always so grumpy?!!! he always seems like he’s in a bad mood whenever he talks to me. He started to give some of that today.. I just do what I normally do.. walked off.. Didnt even bother to look back. If he doesnt care about me.. neither do I.

Anyway, back to more happier stuff.. I have been spending time in Landmark this past week. The store’s so nice and so cool on these hot “rainy” days. Just find a spot and read.. mmm… I’ve been reading stuff that I normally wouldnt.. Like Spiderman Loves MaryJane. ūüėõ It is so CUTE! *my vocabulary is so sucky sometimes* but I really cant think of any other word.. I went back to finish it to see if she MJ ever goes out with¬†Peter.. and.. Well, I wont ruin it for the rest of you. ūüôā
I was also checking out Manga and reading can be quite confusing sometimes because its from right to left.. but it sorta reminded me of Arabic in school * which I was extremely bad at btw..) and I had no idea that they had chick manga.. It is soooo hilarious!!!
And.. hold your breath now.. I found what I had been looking for.. all that hunting in all those book stores, online, asking friends… I finally found Scarlett!!!! For the less informed.. its the sequel to the Gone With the Wind. *sigh* I love that book. I love Rhett. and even though Scarlet doesnt deserve him.. I still want to see them get together.. which I’m hoping is what will happen in this book. *crosses fingers*
So til I can come up with the money to buy the book without asking Mom for it.. I will be spending a lot of time at landmark. And heaven help anyone who takes the book away from me. *ROAR*

Thinking a lot about women who get played so easily by men over and over again. You see them go through it once.. help them on their feet.. hoping they wont get into the same mess again. But thats all you can do.. Hope and Pray.

I’m thankful that she can finally see clearly.. Im afraid that she’ll get hurt again. but she has me for a friend. and I’ll be here the whole time. Praying.¬†

Celebrating Freedom.. *those of you know what I’m talking about..¬†ūüėÄ *


We did it. We finally watched the movie. I sat thru two hours of Himmesh.. im sorry.. HR. There were times when I wanted to get up and run out of the theatre screaming! But I made it. Im alive. I’m so proud of us.. Especially Paras. He watched the horrible thing twice!

The story.. if you could call it one.. is about the life.. actually¬†two weeks in the life¬†of India’s greatest rockstar Himmesh Reshammiya a.k.a HR.¬† *stops¬†Oscar from jumping off a bridge*. HR is on tour in Germany for his¬†“awesome”¬†show *which we missed because we got there late*. After the Show, the police take him away as he is the accused in the murder of a German news Reporter, Nadya Merchant. *That was the time we got to the theatre*.

From the moment we entered the theatre, the movie didnt make sense.¬†It just didnt. There was no flow. Just random scenes. One minute He’s in Germany crying over the fact that his girlfriend is getting married to someone and then suddenly He’s in India singing and “dancing” with her. Then within a day he manages to solve the entire mystery of who killed the girl and why he was being framed. And let me just kill the story for you. The killer was some bald guy wearing a Himmesh mask, cap et al! Can you believe that?!!! A mask that looked exactly like him! ahhahahahahhahahahaha.. What a joke!

We still dont know why he wears a cap or why he laughed like that at a “joke” and why he seemed to be more¬†in love with his best friend than with the beautiful Riaa?! There was a moment when we thought HR would lean in and kiss him! There was a¬†3 second scene of him without a cap but we still dont know what He was trying to hide under the cap! There was also this bit where he¬†drinks for the first time and does this whole¬†Im-so-drunk Dance.¬†Heck.. I¬†act¬†better on a daily¬†basis¬†and I dont¬†even¬†drink! *sugar high*

And the music.. Oh my Goodness… Can you imagine that awful nasal voice in that tiny theatre?! Ouch! That had to be the worst part of the movie.

Mallika Sherawat didnt even have a role in the movie. She was a cross between a ‘lawyer’ and a bar dancer. Awful.. simply awful.¬†Hansika was ok. Nothing great. She’s just a child. And there are moments in the movie when that is so evident! His best friend and his girlfriend¬†Baani¬†were like props in the movie. They were just there shouting out random dialogues expecting us to understand what they were talking about.

The great thing about the movie are the BMW’s… There were so many! I think Oscar enjoyed it the most.. He was so amazed at the way Himmesh was driving that car in that chase scene. I looked at him and he was sitting there with his mouth wide open.. And He kept imagining that he saw Chipmunk everywhere. *name changed to protect Oscar* What is Justin going to think?! tsk tsk.

The weirdest thing was that there were three policemen in uniform sitting behind us!! They left after the first half.. lol.. Maybe they couldnt stand that we were laughing.. especially at all the inappopriate moments. What were we supposed to do?! There he was on the screen telling his girlfriend how much he loved her.. while managing to look constipated the entire time! Thats comedy all the way! ūüėÄ

I have only one thing to say in conclusion-
Where there is Faith, there is No Fear! 
Jahan hai bharosa, wahan darr nahin *finally.. got it!*

Hey Sheila, Wanna go watch it again?

Stop jumping. I was kidding. Im not going to do that to myself again.
Let’s go watch Transformers instead. ūüôā

Sunday Morning!

Good morning! Im up bright and early! Which is surprising coz’ I didnt sleep well most of last night. I think Sheila cursed me. But anyway I was up at 5 to pray. New rule in Church. Turns out people arent praying enough. Let me rephrase that.. Turns out people arent praying at all.

Im not pointing fingers. Im not judging anyone. Its just that I know for a fact if I dont pray God’s not going to wait.. He’ll just go on ahead and I’ll just be left wondering where I went wrong. Its not like I’m indispensable. He can do without me..

So anyway.. praying is such a struggle sometimes. You’re saying something but your mind is somewhere totally different. You have the strangest thoughts. Like today, in the middle of praying I had a sudden “desire” to clean the toilet. You know.. help Mom out a bit.. This is the same me who could sleep through her yelling at me to pick my clothes off the floor.
I’m so grateful for the grace of God. ūüôā

Apart from that, I realized that it is possible for life to get crazier.. just when you think that it has reached the Limit for Crazy.. Surprise surprise.. Down we go again!

So the Taj Mahal has made it once again as one of the seven Wonders in the World! Woohoo! which is not surprising.. I’m sure everyone in the world knows atleast one.. no.. Two Indians. Think of all the votes that must’ve poured in! For the¬†nuts who claim to be Indians (born, brought up in India) the Taj mahal was not built ny Akbar for his Begum!
ShahJahan built it for his late wife Mumtaz. He was crazy about her! The whole thing is made out of one marble stone.. (something like that) and after the Taj was built ShahJahan was so particular that the monument should not be copied by anyone else.. he cut off the hands of all the workers who built it!!! ouch!
But I’m still mighty proud that the Taj made it there..even though I have never seen it myself.

Tomorrow hopefully will be the day we watch the greatest movie of all time-
Aap ka Surroor, the Moviee, the real luv story! *laughter*

If I cant get up off the floor because of laughing at Himmesh,I would be really obliged if you could carry me out of the theatre!
*still laughing*

have a great sunday!

p.s- I’m sorry the post has absolutely nothing to do with Sunday morning.
p.p.s- I dont really care.

Thought for the Day

A woman’s heart¬†should be so hidden in God that a man must seek Him to find her.

Thankyou Celeste

All those years of watching TV for hours and hours actually paid off.
Learning to actually do a pretty authentic Brit accent is helping me now..

I was at my IELTS class and we had a test today where we had¬†to listen to random conversations in¬†British English and answer the questions while we were listening.¬†Honestly it can get pretty annoying…¬†Im not looking down on them or trying to insult them..¬†they talk in a sing song voice sometimes.. but i still like it better than the slow American¬†drawl.. ūüėõ

So anyway, we finish the test and we’re checking to see how many¬†we got right.. I got them all! All 40 wer right!¬†ok ok.. not that great I know..¬†But what was shocking was that I was the only¬†one. the second highest was 35. lol… What an achievement..

To make things worse..¬†there are these guys who sit at the back and joke about everything. They make stupid comments and the poor¬†teacher has a tough time keeping¬†the¬†class in order when they’re around..

This was the scene:

Teacher- ok. Has anyone got a score between 37 and 39
Me- *barely raising hand* I did..               I got a 40.
Teacher- *shocked* you did?
Cute guy from the back- clap clap clap

So the whole class clapped while I sat there.. completely embarrassed!

The teacher assumed that¬†I did well coz’ my mother¬†tongue was English. I wanted to¬†stand up for mallus around the world.. lol.. But I didnt. I simply said No.. still quite red in the face.¬†

I’ve¬†come a long way.. From learning to talk before I could walk.. Learning¬†to run¬†before I could crawl. *lol*
I learnt Malayalam before¬†English..¬†and I had a mallu accent¬†when I¬†moved to¬†M’bai. but¬†it wasnt that bad.. atleast I didnt think so.
Sheila- Stop laughing. It wasnt that bad..

But¬†I’m still quite lost. I make crazy mistakes¬†and If¬†someone throws a lot of big words¬†while discussing the political¬†problems in Chile¬†or some such topic..¬†Im completely clueless!
So if ever you see just smiling and nodding at whatever you’re saying.. Be assured that I do not have a clue as to what you are saying!

Did I mention.. that¬†I¬†treated myself to a slice of Chocolate cake and a brownie. ūüėÄ I thought I deserved it! Dont look at me like that.

Oh and I’,m completely addicted to the Laree chootee song from Ek chalis ki last local.
*thankyou Sheila* I think Abhay Deol looks really cute in that movie.. He reminds me of Yusuf..
btw.. When are you¬†leaving¬†Sheila?? hahaha ūüėÄ

khwaab hai to mujhko na jagaa..


now what?

I have to say it out loud.

I’m scared. Terribly scared of the future and what I’m going to do.¬†¬†

I mean.. I’ve been thinking of this Canada thing for over a year now and I think its a great idea.
I’ve prayed. God spoke. I heard.

Then, Why am I still afraid?

Its just that going there means that I’ll suddenly be on my own. And thats never happened before.
I wasn’t scared when I moved to Mumbai 8 years ago.. I had Mom and Justin with me.

but now.. I’ll be on my own.


I dont know if I can handle that kind of responsibilty.

If I mess up.. I’m done for. Completely done for.

And then there’s the whole.. What If i didnt hear right? What if God was saying something totally different the whole time.

But deep down I know He wants me to go there. He has something for me there. Something that I have to do.

I hate moving. Always have. Even if it was just moving across the street.

moving to a different continent?!


What if people dont talk to me? What if I dont make a single friend?

It took me almost two years to get used to living in Mumbai… and for two years I hated it! I hated the people.. I hated how everyone looked down on everyone else. How school girls¬†acted a little too old for their age. The gossip. The lying. The cheating. Making all the wrong friends before making a few good ones.

I’ll just have to leave it to God. There is nothing else I can do.